I lost my best friend

I lost my love. I lost my best friend and I lost my heart. I returned from SK a few hours ago and planned to do my next blog post on seeing the unprecedented record breaking number of Whooping Cranes for all of Canada. I saw 157 in one day and 126 in one spot. Well that all changed when I put down my luggage and my dogs came to greet me. I noticed my big girl was rapidly breathing and that she was coughing she was still wagging her tail and came to hug me. She then began coughing up blood and it started to come out of her nose. I got her to the car and drove straight to animal emergency in Vancouver by Alberta and 7th. By this point she was having great difficulty and blood was coming out on my back seat. I lifted her into the vet clinic all 60 pounds of her and the vets and staff took her straight into the back. A few minutes later the vet comes out to tell me the bad news that a ultrasound showed her liver to be enlarged and that she had cancer that spread from the liver into the lungs and one of the tumors in her lungs burst causing her to have blood come out the nose and cough. Her heart rate was beating really rapidly and she was not well. The vet told me that things didn't look good. While she was telling me this a nurse ran into tell the doctor she had to come back for Sammy because she was fading. The vet ran back and then came back to me and said she was going into cardiac arrest I began crying hysterically. The vet said the only option I had was to put her down . It all happened so fast. I couldn't believe it. 3 weeks ago my regular vet said she was so healthy for her age. No heart problems, no blood work problems and she was doing great. And now she was dying. I agreed to euthanize her and was there with her when she passed I broke down. I have had her since she was a puppy. I have had her for 12 years. I adopted her from the SPCA. She had come down from Quesnel. God I miss her. I don't know how this cancer was undiagnosed until now. She showed no signs of illness till today.... If it weren't for this ultrasound tonight...

800$ later she is gone as quick as that. I just put down my suitcase.... I never thought I wouldn't see her again when I left a week ago. She was always there to comfort me through so many traumatic events in my life. Through every pain and sorrow she was there with her unconditional love. She was my protector, she made me feel safe. She alerted me to any danger.

I loved to take her birding with me when we went out alone. She helped me find many Common Nighthawks and their nests. She was always so gentle with birds  she would lie down and watch them never approaching or chasing. I would love to walk her at Iona. She would lie down while I lay down on the dyke photographing snow buntings. However every year we would go out and find nighthawks together.

I will miss her forever. Life is so short and she may be an animal ... some may say "it's just a dog" but she was my family,,,, as I said she was my heart. She was a Border Collie X Australian Cattle Dog (Blue Heeler).

I am so sad ... so devastated and will miss her for the rest of my life.

Goodbye my friend. Goodbye Sammy. Goodbye my baby. Life will never be the same without you.

Thanks for all the good times and thanks for loving me. What a sad thanksgiving for me but I am thankful I had this beautiful dog in my life for 12 years. I am also grateful that she is no longer suffering because it kills me to know she must have been in great pain.

"Sammy" Gone but never forgotten. (2006-2018)

I will miss you forever Sammy (2006-2018)

I hope you know how much you were loved Sammy. I always knew how much and how unconditionally you loved me. Here is a song for you... Thanks for the memory...





Comments

  1. Mel,

    I am so very sorry to hear that you have lost such a beautiful, intelligent, and beloved companion. Life is enriched in so many ways by friends like these who accept, understand, and support us unconditionally through many of life's ups and downs. My deepest condolences to you on your loss.

    Hui

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    Replies
    1. Thank you for your touching words hui. it means a lot to me.

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  2. Dear Mel, this is heartbreaking. I know how much Sammy meant to you and how hard it must be to lose her so suddenly and unexpectedly. I hope you find some comfort in knowing that she had a long and wonderful life as your companion and was loved and cared for during every minute of it. She will continue to live on in your memories and in your heart. My sincerest condolences.

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  3. Dear Mel, I am so sorry to hear of your heart breaking loss, they become so much a part of you that it is like losing a close member of your family. The only consolation is that she is not suffering any longer and I am sure that she knew just how much you loved her and she loved you just as much.

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    Replies
    1. thank you so much for your words of comfort it really helps me in my grief.

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  4. Thank you for your wonderful blog. But I was so sorry to read about sammy's passing. I also lost my dog recently (last week) and he had also been with me for a long time. Dominick was also adopted, a collie/shepherd mix found loose in New Mexico, adopted by some college kids in Colorado, and then given to me after they had him for a year and didn't want him Anymore. His favorite thing to do was run. When he was young, he loved to escape and run the neighborhood, especially across the street to the horses when we were in colorado! This was even after exercise...lol. as he grew older, this changed, but his free spirit and independence remained and I grew to love that about him. He was unique..one of kind..like sammy was I am sure.

    A friend of mine let me bury him on her beautiful horse farm in upstate new york. She wouldn't accept any money from me, but instead asked me to donate to a horse rescue outside of San Diego that she is close with that is struggling with funding. I thought I would share dominick's story and the link to the gofundme page for the rescue because I was moved by sammy's story and maybe someone reading this would be moved by ours.

    There are so many animals in need. It makes me feel better to give back to them and do what I can while I grieve the loss of mine.

    Bless your heart and sammy's soul. Hugs to you from new jersey.

    https://www.gofundme.com/emergency-fall-hay-fund

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    Replies
    1. thanks so much michelle for your kind words and for sharing your story about your beloved dog. That is beautiful that you donated to the horse rescue. I agree there are so many rescues in need of adoption I was glad I got all my animals from the spca and will continue to do so in the future.

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  5. Loosing a furry friend hurts deeply and rightly so they are a member of the family. Sorry for the loss of your Sammy. You love your pets so deeply the pain in your heart must be searing. Take some solace that Sammy had a loving person to share with all those years. Sammy's glow will be with you forever.

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    Replies
    1. thanks yes she was more than a pet she was my family. I don't have kids so she was like my kid and it kills me not having her here. I miss her so much and the house is empty without her. my other dog pancakes misses her so much and is sad. i am trying to focus on the happy memories but at this time I really need sammy and miss her life is unfair.

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  6. Sammy was such a beautiful dog. It is very sad that this tragedy happened.

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    Replies
    1. thank you she really was beautiful and appreciate your kind words it sure is tragic for me i miss her so much :(

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